Sunday, December 30, 2012

2 Friendship in Islam

Your only friend is Allah, then His Messenger and those who believe, who establish Salah and pay Zakah and bow before Allah. [5:55]

حَدَّثَنِي مُوسَى بْنُ إِسْمَاعِيلَ، حَدَّثَنَا عَبْدُ الْوَاحِدِ، حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو بُرْدَةَ بْنُ عَبْدِ اللهِ، قَالَ سَمِعْتُ أَبَا بُرْدَةَ بْنَ أَبِي مُوسَى، عَنْ أَبِيهِ ـ رضى الله عنه ـ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ الله صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏‏ مَثَلُ الْجَلِيسِ الصَّالِحِ وَالْجَلِيسِ السَّوْءِ كَمَثَلِ صَاحِبِ الْمِسْكِ، وَكِيرِ الْحَدَّادِ، لاَ يَعْدَمُكَ مِنْ صَاحِبِ الْمِسْكِ إِمَّا تَشْتَرِيهِ، أَوْ تَجِدُ رِيحَهُ، وَكِيرُ الْحَدَّادِ يُحْرِقُ بَدَنَكَ أَوْ ثَوْبَكَ أَوْ تَجِدُ مِنْهُ رِيحًا خَبِيثَةً

Abu Musa al-Ash'ari رضي الله عنه said The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said A good friend and a bad friend are like a perfume-seller and a blacksmith: The perfume-seller might give you some perfume as a gift, or you might buy some from him, or at least you might smell its fragrance. As for the blacksmith, he might singe your clothes, and at the very least you will breathe in the fumes of the furnace. [Sahih al-Bukhari] 
عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ أَنَّ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ‏ الْمَرْءُ عَلَى دِينِ خَلِيلِهِ، فَلْيَنْظُرْ أَحَدُكُمْ مَنْ يُخَالِلْ
Abu Huraira  رضي الله عنه  reported: The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said: A man is upon the religion of his best friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends [Ahmed]

Alhamdulillah, we all know how much it is exciting and entertaining when it comes to meeting friends and spending time together. Mankind can't live alone every individual must live and interact with others. When interacting with others one either influences or is himself influenced.

As parents it is very important to choose decent and faithful friends to our kids. It has been proven through experience that habits and behavior of friend and associates slowly manifest in an individual. Without realizing a person begins to adopt the style and behavior of his friends. 

There are 3 types of friends:
  1. Those that are necessary like nourishment and you can't live without them.
  2. Those that are like medicine and our beneficial, so you need them sometimes.
  3. Those that are like a sickness and you do not need them at all 
I know the emotional feeling of my own kids on how they behave when they receive the letters from their pen pals. Why not! friendship is an important part of each individual to show their feeling, experience, happy and sorrow.

Even the best of creation our beloved Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم had a highest level of friendship with whom we all knew is Abu Bakr رضي الله عنه the first man to accept Islam. Even after being beaten unconscious by the Quraysh, he was most concerned about how the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم was. 
عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى الله عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ: إِنَّ أَحَدَكُمْ مِرْآةُ أَخِيهِ، فَإِنْ رَأَى بِهِ أَذًى فَلْيُمِطْهُ عَنْهُ
Also the child should be explained the above hadeeth, Abu Huraira رضي الله عنه said that Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم Each of you is a mirror for his brother. If he sees something bad, let him remove it for him. [Tirmidhi]

Because he helps him to maintain correct behavior, so each one of them should advise kindly without exposing him publicly or sneer at him when they do something haram.

Instead of making friends with the misguided ones we should befriend with righteous, yet treat the rest in a gracious and just manner. 

The dangerous of having corrupt friends isn't confined to the worldly life, such friendship produce repentance on the day of resurrection too. 

And (Be mindful of) the Day the wrongdoer will bite his hands saying,“Would that I had taken a path along with the messenger! Woe to me! Would that I had not taken so-and-so for my friend! Indeed he led me astray from the advice after it had come to me.” And the Satan is man’s betrayer. [25:27-29]

The 2 main regrets on the day of judgement are not following Muhammed صلى الله عليه وسلم on the path of guidance and befriending a person who diverted one from the truth. The Exalted says in Nobel Qur'an:

Friends, on that day, will become enemies to one another, except the God-fearing [43:67]

Here the Qur'an is not saying that friends will not help or benefit each other on that day, it is saying something much stronger that friends who were not God fearing will be the enemies of each other on the day of Qiyamah.

Another point I would like to emphasize is the company of the scholars, these are the words Luqman عليه السلام instructed his son, "keep the company of the scholars and listen attentively to the words of the wise, for therewith Allah revives the dead hearts just as he revives the dead earth with heavy rain".

Finally we ask Allah to make us of the righteous ones and give us companions that will take us away from his wrath and lead us his pleasure and paradise!          


  1. Assalamu Alaikum

    Very well said sis, you always inspire me a lot, your very natural in homeschooling, and i really love all your ways. the best thing in your blog is you post everything with Quran verses and hadiths, makes very meaningful to what u do in the way of Islam. I hav a lot to learn from u. May almighty Allah accept all your hard works and make our homeschooling success to dunya and aakhira Ameen. (Sorry for the long post)

    1. Wa alaykum salam

      Jazakillah for your kind and encouraging words.I also pray that Allah tha'la grant us good health to continue it.Yes, the Quran and Hadith has comprehensive and complete guidance for all humanity.May Allah grant us true understanding and guide us on the straight path!